Cenus Takers Accuse Locals Of Hiding Hokie Birds

Carol Flynn was peering into a Progress Street apartment recently, not the least bit concerned about local police arresting her.

“I’m here to count every Hokie Bird. And I know these students are hiding them,” she said, drumming her fingers on her official Census Taker clipboard.

Asked if she had found any, Flynn grimaced and admitted “none yet,” but she had discovered numerous garden gnomes housed inside.

“Garden gnomes must be in a garden, otherwise, you are housing them. And that’s just not correct. They are outdoor citizens. Understand?”

 No.

 Flynn said she enjoys her power, little that it may be.

“I’ve seen shocking things peeking in windows. I record them on my cell phone camera and post the videos on YouTube under my username, MakeCenusOfThis,” she admitted.

 

Flynn also discovered Xanadu hiding more Mermen in their closets.

And Chief Toby Tobacco continues to be housed in Blacksburg Pipe and Tobacco, the only  true native in the Blacksburg cenus.

Also, he continues to smoke inside, despite the recent state ban on smoking within establishments.